I wonder what each of us would do if we were asked that question by the Savior. Would we look at those around us and say in our hearts, 'He’s probably talking about Brother Johnson. I’ve always wondered about him,' or 'I’m glad Brother Brown is here. He really needs to hear this message'? Or would we, like those disciples of old, look inward and ask that penetrating question: 'Is it I?'
In these simple words, 'Lord, is it I?' lies the beginning of wisdom and the pathway to personal conversion and lasting change."
I read this last week from President Uchtdorf's Conference Talk to the Priesthood. It hit me deeply. I asked myself, what am I truly at fault of? What have I need to change? Personal faults have maximized here in Kansas, such as questioning authority, focusing inward, overly-criticizing others, boosting pride, impatience, easy to anger and frustrate. When the Lord speaks through the scriptures or through my leaders to ME, and rebukes and calls to repentance, do I submit? Or excuse myself by the faults of others?
Whether others continually wrong my companion and I matters not. I have things to improve. I must change. What others do should never, ever keep me from doing the Lord's will and striving to become better.
Our numbers this week were alright. They could be better, ya know? Always haha... but they were a reflection of the inner issues preventing us from moving forward. I know that it is I. There is much that I did not and could not do because of my weakness, and I must repent and do better!
Everybody? Charlie is amazing. He has real demons in his past, and although they have come back full force to keep him from the waters of baptism he has clung to this gospel. White knuckles on the rod, we hold near him encouraging and speaking gentle words of the Savior as the storm blows our legs out from beneath us, and the rod has stood strong. Oh how the Lord always stands so firm and perfect. We are so lucky to lean on such an immovable foundation. Charlie is meeting with Pres Bell Tuesday for his official interview. He tells every member we bring to our visits that Heavenly Father has sent angels to him, and he is evolving gloriously because of it.
On a lighter note, my District Leader is a gifted artist, and blesses us with his talents set on a hill by drawing visual lessons. Here in this picture we see that SS, the semi, is approaching at great speed with billowing diesel fumes the timid PP, porcupine. We were left to ponder SS and PP... Silly String ain't got nothing on Puny Pickles? Prideful Prancers might be quilly, but Severus Snape has got the power? We were disappointed to learn that it was merely Solution Semi meets Problematic Porcupine. Despite all of the playful banter, we learned that we demolish problems in our life when we simply observe what stands in our way, and make necessary turns to dodge them.
hahaha, I love ya'll. So very much. I feel your prayers profoundly. I know I am distant and unresponsive a lot of the time to your kind letters and packages. I think of you and love you immensely!!
PS: feel free to shoot me an email of a recent ridiculous mishappening or silliness in your life! Good laughs heal the cockled soul :P
PPS: I challenge you all to read and contemplate Uchtdorf's words at: https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/lord-is-it-i?lang=eng