Monday, October 27, 2014

Charlie‏

Fifty, crisp jeans and fancy cowboy boots, one-cigarette-two-three-chain-after-another, spit, fourth generation Kansan native, recently divorced leaving his family inheritance of a major antique plantation to her vanity, and a brain-vault of every religion's faults UNTIL HE MET SISTERS.

We are the second batch of Sisters to knock on his door and with his kindness he always listened and talked an awful lot, like talks our ears out. But it is always deep doctrine, the same, our doctrine, but his own theories and mullings as he has studied the Word. The last time he walked into a church was eight years ago to bid his passed father farewell. Yesterday morning unexpectedly he calls in confusion to the area being much more suburbized than he last remembered of it's fields of green, needing direction to the church.

Heart attack.

He was an hour early! Thank heaven we felt the need to go there much earlier than usual... and standing in the empty chapel made him so uncomfortable, so we walked. We rounded the parking lot seven times I counted. And we talked, and relaxed, prepared, became reverent.

Jesus Christ sacrificed his entire glorious life. He gave it all away. He put aside his family and his friends and food and hobbies and "work" and vacations. He fasted and he prayed, he taught and he healed, then he sacrificed himself. There was no payment made, why do people say that? He didn't PAY for anything I've finally realized, he went through it to change HIMSELF as a mediator. then we can see what he did and feel deep in our heart in our intelligence love and desire to change. He did it so that you and I can change. Charlie changed yesterday. He gave up his fear and his worry and pride, intimidation, trust issues, smoking, chewing, wasting away. He gave it up to know Christ more profoundly and I'm crying. I'm crying right now because he is changing.

Sorry guys, I'm a bit more deep today.... drawing nearer to Christ does that huh? haha

oh boy I'm going to be so weird when I get home hahaha. And I'm gonna STAY weird because Bednar told me to! I hope you all really prepare haha, I'm not going to be the same person and of course I'll play and laugh and be myself but I will NEVER stop this routine. I just can't. There is too much to do, so little time!

I love you, thanks for all that give updates it's incredible!!! Does anybody want some clothes?? and chocolate? haha, I'm giving them up. They are so dumb!

LOVE YOU LOVE YOU!!!

Best,
Sister Murphy

Monday, October 13, 2014

Takin away like a feather now‏

In the Wind! Cuz the real wind's here in Kansas
See the sky, wish I could put that all on canvas
Thinkin back, to those days spent up on campus
Never thought, life could be the slandest
Now I'm gone!
Gone fishin!
We baptize.
We ain't just wishin!
 
In the Kansas Wichita Mission!
We are the servants ooooff the Lord!


 
Just thought I'd give you a bit of an AWESOME song one of our Elders wrote awhile back. He's a freestyle rapper with a uke, heck yeah!
 
But it also fits because I really am leaving. I am transferring to Topeka Zone! Up North! Past Manhattan Kansas and somewhat near Kansas City. I assume it's a bit colder up there... and it's a smaller town called Holton, pretty isolated. Bout time! I've been wanting to experience a bit more authentic Kansas, rather than the run-down, citified suburbias with it's harsh super-wealthy/dramatically-poor dynamic.
 
This past week was mind-blowing. Which is unfortunate because I NEVER know what to say in these emails when this happens.... there simply are no words that can express the change distilled in me.
 
I guess it starts from regular scripture study and prayer. Through it I've been learning particular doctrine, which enables endless mysteries to become clearer, developing a firmer understanding of who I am and my purpose for my entire life on Earth. Naturally this enhances my relationship with God and heightens a keen attention to the Spirit. The next step was endurance. No matter how difficult overcoming particular weaknesses and trials are, one endures by "taking His yoke upon you." One must beg the Lord to guide you and hold their hand, the entire way. And lastly, what has more directly contributed to this past week's aha! moment was striving to become pure, even as Christ is pure. I've literally fasted from my worldly ways. I'm fasting from several carnal natures that have inhibited success and miracles from occurring within my ministry. It's been 13 days with 27 to go, and maybe even a lifetime if I choose it.
 
So, KABLAMMO!!! I'm a new woman! But it's not just like POP I'm new, I'm still striving and changing immensely every day. "Good measure, pressed down...shaken together, and running over."
 
There was a son of some of the dearest members I've bonded with here in HP. He visited over the weekend from Manhattan (ironically) and we joined the three of them for dinner (rice, beans, cheese and pickels. YUM!) (Really though, it was actually delicious). He had all of these questions, so articulately strayed from the reality of God and the Lord's just and merciful nature. His concern was that even if He is in fact just and merciful, we are STILL in HIS world, playing HIS game. ...wow. What a logical but SO WRONG perspective. I still honestly have no answers.... but it was a whirlwind of a night and Sister Cramer and I as women were no match for the task. However, the SPIRIT was, and He abided the entire conversation. He helped us know exactly what to say, not as I would say it, but as HE would.
 
As usual, this experience was sacred and I choose not to share details. I hold these experiences dear and merely hope and pray that all of you are striving for miracles in your life also. Are you actually putting aside the things of the world and digging deeper in Christ's teachings to apply them in your life? Are the things you do daily teaching you exactly what Christ's voice sounds like? When He calls, will you know it? And will He know you?
 
My heart is running over with joy and love for you all. I'm being catapulted into unknown (Topeka), and though my heart will be left behind I am THRILLED to behold a more daunting mountain to climb. I ache to boulder and slip and cling and hoist and strengthen. OH MAN!! This life on earth is so beyond exciting to live :)
 
I love you all and pray for you and wish you the best in your daily lives, included with BOM study and a prayer in your heart ;D
 
Best,
Sister Murph
 
Gonna miss Sister Cramer like crazy.... like so crazy. I love the crap outta her.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Left Side

STRONG SIDE!!!

"Hey ladies, I'm feelin sick again today, don't worry about coming to meet me let's reschedule."

We were driving when Ada texted us, and our hearts sunk, again. There's always the mental note, "let it go, this happens every day, just keep going." Seriously though, it is tough to receive rejections over and over again. But I took a deep breath and felt the impression we need to be bold this time. "Ada, we promise that if you let us in regardless today, you will feel better and our visit will go well." "Okay," she responded. Cramer and I cheered!!! Once we arrived and knocked they yelled for us to come in. Inside the cool, plant filled front room there was Ada, sitting in the recliner, looking feeble and battered. After a life of heavy drug addictions and then some, Ada at only 43 years old looked no younger than 70. As she has withdrawn her body has been destabilizing, not knowing how to function without the use of heavy drugs.

"I don't feel good at all today," her smoker voice muttered. We smiled and told her we were really grateful she let us in. She admitted a powerful Spirit came in with us (just as we had prayed for) and she begun feeling more at peace. We small talked, then reached to grab our scriptures when Ada suddenly said, "I can't feel the left side of my entire body. Deb, help me!!" The left side of her mouth was indeed lazy, and her head had sort of sunk back into the chair. Her roommate Deb in her old age was little to no help, and panic started surging through my veins. "I can't... breathe... Deb... help me.." I shouted for Deb to call 9-1-1 and Cramer and I knelt at Ada's feet to hold her hands, "Don't...you dare.... let.. go of ..my hands," she said, tears streaming down her lifeless face. Deb was making no progress with the medics, not understanding what was happening to Ada, so I grabbed the phone from her and kept them updated on the progress (yes, I get a bit too controlling sometimes haha). Then Cramer started praying. We prayed and told Ada that even if God's choice was to take her home that it was all going to be alright, she had repented and changed her life for the better, He was going to take care of her no matter what. She cried. Within minutes the medics appeared. "It's a codeRED," said one of them. As we clenched her clammy hands, Ada was having a major stroke.

We'd stay, but we really mus-dache!!! 
Just me, Sister Roquemore and Mama Bell, the President's wife!! keepin it real.

The rest of the evening was crazy, but Sister Cramer and I couldn't get over the peace that came from knowing it was God's will that His messengers be there for Ada in a trying moment. Another moment followed the next evening when a LA woman called us urgently to help find priesthood holders to bless her broken son. And then we were in homes for conference that needed our Spirit, needed the Lord's assurance that He loves them.

Two things I learned more profoundly: We NEED to pray for the help of the Spirit, and he will guide us. This is so hard to learn, it can only come line upon line as we diligently seek for His assistance and comfort. The Second is that we need to tell everyone, including ourselves (in the mirror even, like I do!) that their Father in heaven LOVES them. "You are HIS daughter, a queen, deeply loved and appreciated by Him, your Creator." I have Eyering's words from yesterday dancing in my thoughts, that I (and you) can never comprehend how much and how deeply Heavenly Father loves me (and you!).

Hope all has been well, hope you've filled your spiritual cup from Conference, hope you are applying it into your life and setting new goals!! I love you all so dearly. Time is flying. I am soaring :) I love you love you love you!!

Happy Octoberyness!! Best, Sista Murphateer